staying sane in the middle of everything

Hello,

You should know that I made this blog to share recipes with you, and give you a bit more than just pictures of food. However, I also made this blog for me, because for some reason I think I have things to share with you that might help you throughout your days. Saying it will help you throughout your life would be a bit much but if that ends up being the case, I’ll be more than happy knowing I made even the smallest difference.

That said, though I have focused a lot on food, and this is what this blog is about, from time to time, I’d like to bring up issues related to wellness in terms of how you feel within yourself, being within a world that will probably shake you up quite a bit, quite a few times.

One of the most valuable things you can have in this life, if not the most valuable, are human relationships. I realized that my most loving and important relationships are some of the most vital reasons why I’m alive, why I keep being who I am and why I see myself the way I do.

This is not saying that our relationships, especially the bad ones, define us and somehow bind us to remain in the same situation if we are unhappy; nonetheless, I do want to place great importance on our relationships as they shape our every day. It seems to me like the greatest joys in the world are making a new friend, finding someone you want to spend your life with, having your first child and being with the people that you love and are important to you. I know that for one, whenever I am with many people I love at the same time, I am always overcome by my emotions and find the need to tell them just how much they are important to me.

Unfortunately, it also seems like some of our biggest problems, except those related to our survival, are also due to these very important relationships. Issues with friends, someone not loving us back and rejecting us, feeling like we’re being attacked by our loved ones because of their very insecurities, are all things that we experience due to us being in constant contact with others.

Because we are so invested in relationships, and because we understand ourselves through the roles we take on in other people’s lives and through how they see us, issues between us and these very people can be very disorienting. I’ve noticed that I find myself questioning my life and my being whenever one of my relationships is a bit unstable.

Thus, I’d like to stress the need to find a way to be able to feel stable by ourselves, without the help of others. There has to be a time in our day, or maybe in our week, where we forget about the people around us and reconnect with only ourselves. There are plenty of ways one can do it, maybe going for a run, meditating, sitting at home with our favorite books, doing nothing and simply thinking about one’s life and self. I for one, do it through cooking.

The point of having something that is simply ours, which is not shared with others, and which makes us happy, is that it can be a valuable way of not “melting down” as soon as another aspect of our lives is put into perspective and is being re-evaluated. There has to be a moment in our day when we do something that we ourselves can consider “good”, “valuable” and “worthwhile”.

Finding things to do that are truly mine, in my experience makes me love myself just a bit more everyday. It forces me to not expect approval from others in order to be proud, rather, approval from myself.

So I urge you to find something you love, which is simply yours.

It can definitely change throughout the years. For the longest time, the moment I was happiest during my day was when I would ride my horse, it was the moment I would come back down to earth, embrace the moment and focus on myself and my horse. Nowadays, because I have no access to horseriding I found a new hobby, and that is cooking and exercising.

I hope you find something that, in the moment you are doing it, is simply yours and that it helps you value and love yourself a bit more.

If you have something like that, let me know in the comments below. I’d love to read your experiences!

Much much love to all,
Marina

 

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